My name is Thea Jolly and I am a perfectionist. Not all the time, and not in all areas of my life. I accept that I don’t have enough time and energy to do everything I want to, or feel I ‘should’ do, and generally manage my expectations accordingly in many areas of my life.
But unfortunately I am a perfectionist in the most important part of my life – my parenting. Because I think being a mum is the most crucial and important job I will ever have, I set very high standards and expectations. Because being a mum is the hardest and most challenging job I will ever have, I will never meet those unrealistically high standards and expectations.
What I’ve realised only recently is that being a perfectionist mum is damaging my children, my relationship with my husband, and of course me and my happiness. It is not just ‘how I am’ and something to be proud of. It is a destructive state of mind with damaging habits and ways of thinking about myself, my children and life in general.
This blog will follow my attempts at learning about perfectionism, what is damaging me, what I need to change, and my successes along the way. I hope it will be useful to others out there too, who put too many unnecessary pressures on themselves, especially in their roles as mums, or dads.